A man sees a blonde across the river. Man: How do I get to the other side? Blonde: You are on the other side.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because he was dead.

Pie are Round!!!!!! After the math teacher told the class that the area of a circle is r2, the Kentucky mountain man said: “Pie are not square! Pie are round! Cornbread are square!”

I don’t know why people always make such a fuss about how much a newborn weighs. It’s a baby, not a stash of cocaine.

The name Corey is short for Coriander. Coreys will try & tell you it’s not but they are lying.

What do you call a conversation at a proctologist meeting? Butt-Talks

Congratulations to my ice maker for winning my fridge’s annual “Ice Maker of the Year” award for the 4th straight year!

There is only one ideal dance partner & it is an empty apartment

I hope when the Incredible Hulk and Kool-Aid Man retire they’ll open up a small demolition business together.

So we no longer say “please” and “thanks” in the office? Never got the memo. But I did get one saying it’s ok to key impolite people’s cars.