What do you call an Irishman who slept out on the lawn all night? Patty-O`Furniture

How is credit like cocaine? Everyone just needs 1 more line.

I’m not gay.. I just like 9 inch black clits. Peckas.

What’s the most beautiful thing in Advanced Physics? A passing grade. 🙂

When i dont understand a joke I read on /r/Jokes I don’t get it

(starts to scramble eggs) “THESE YOLKS WON’T BREAK! THIS IS TAKING FOREVER!” (.0008 seconds later) “Oh, ok.”

“OMG IT’S RAINING A LITTLE BIT AND NOW I’VE FORGOTTEN EVERYTHING I’VE EVER KNOWN!!!” – Drivers, apparently.

I heard they’re inventing a new kind of bed… …but most of the theories I’ve heard are bunk.

I’m 28 years old, but in marriage years, I’m already dead.

How much does a dead elephant weigh? A skele**ton**.