Three statisticians are hunting when they see a rabbit. The first one shoots and misses him on the left. The second shoots and misses him on the right. The third one shouts, “We’ve hit it!”

What do the letters G, I, T, N, H, N & O have in common? nothing

How does the sun cut his hair? Eclipse it.

How many feminist does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they don’t change anything.

What separates Humans from Animals? The Mediterranean Sea.

How can you tell when Dracula is sick? By his coughin’

When you assassinate, you make an ass out of ass innate.

My husband brought home one happy meal for two kids. Frankly things would have been less dramatic if he’d brought home a girlfriend.

Why do Apples new headphones look like tampons? Because they’re made exclusively for cunts.

I was furious when I found my wife’s profile on a dating website That lying bitch isn’t “fun to be around”