Did you hear about the man with five keen senses? He still lacked common and horse!

Unable to stop their phones and washing machines from exploding, Samsung announced today they’re changing their name to the ACME Corp.

I find it kinda funny that people still reuse memes from 10 years ago and i find it kinda sad that these things these people talk of are the best they ever have.

Just gave the Earth a one-star rating and a bad review on TripAdvisor to discourage any aliens that were planning an invasion.

In tonight’s debate Trump said we can’t trust the rebels I’m not surprised; he has always reminded me of Emperor Palpatine.

What was the first think Queen Elizabeth did on ascending to the throne ? Sat down !

Paying for things with hugs Because it’s legal tender.

News reports say that someone stole all the toilets from the police station downtown. The cops have nothing to go on.

What’s the only thing a feminist is going to change? The Laundry

Feminism is a broad issue.