I had a best friend who wore a gorilla suit everywhere… he was my prime-mate.

“God” not mentioned in Democratic platform means they don’t worship God. “Money” mentioned eleven times in Republican platform.

A gaggle of geese. A murder of crows. A nope of laundry.

Did you hear about corduroy pillows? They are making head lines everywhere

What emits a monochromatic beam of salty snack food? Frito Layser.

Why did the bicycle fall over? it was too tired!

Eric Clapton So over the years Eric Clapton has developed an aversion to Microsoft and prefers to use hardware made my by Apple instead. Why? Simply because Windows killed his child.

Yesterday my doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating. I asked, “Why is that, doc?” He replied, “I’m trying to examine you.”

According to my mate 3 genders exist. Female Male And mental illness

What do you call a snobby criminal going down the stairs? A condescending con descending.