I actually heard this joke in a dream this morning What do you call a little square that hasn’t developed its new dimension yet? Precubescent

I quit Reddit.

Oh yeah!! Well, if smoking weed destroys your short-term memory, then what does smoking weed do?

The best part of the Grammys was Justin Bieber not performing

What did the elephant say? When he lost his penis.

How do you stop a Polish tank? Shoot the guy that’s pushing it

My best friend was talking to me about proposing to his girlfriend. I’m not sure though, she’s not really my type.

How do you get a full grown elephant on to the subway? You take the “S” out of “Sub”, and then you take the “F” out of “Way”.

Did you know President Obama can run around the White House in 11:00? It would be a record, but Bush did 9:11.

The entire Dutch air force was disabled this week. The pilot was sick.