Rules for rap battling Eminem: 1. Do not let Eminem go first. 2. Do not let Eminem go second.

Gay jokes aren’t funny… …I mean, come on guys.

Why is CoD: Infinite Warfare set in space? Because no one on earth wants to buy it.

How do you eat a DNA spaghetti? With a replication fork (you can also use your zinc fingers…)

What do you call 20 niggers in the emergency room? Family reunion They even brought a bucket of KFC

I lost my job as a massage therapist. Apparently, I rub people the wrong way.

My wife saw an ad in a window Which said “tampons 50cents” Is that true, she asked the shopkeeper… Very true, he said….”no strings attached”

One time I saw a biker’s funeral procession and realized even dead people are cooler than me.

Show him you care by setting his house on fire so he will have to move in with you and never be lonely again.

If I had a nickel for every time I thought of you I’d start thinking about you.