I was forced to put my grades up for adoption I just couldn’t raise them

I’m moving to Ottawa and opening a gym. I’m gonna call it Capital Gainz.

Wait, you didn’t let me finish. What I was trying to say is Hitler was largely misunderstood by people who don’t speak German.

I heard about this one place with red signs that thanked drivers for slowing down… …but when I drove by, everything was blue.

Why do I always sit in the back of an airplane? Cos iv never heard of an airplane reverse into a mountain… ill help myself out…

I sleep better naked…why can’t the flight attendant understand this?

How many grammar mistakes does it take to piss off your English teacher? not alot. (Just thought of it, tell me what you think 🙂 )

Hey, guy from the gym with lifting gloves still on, you can take them off now, you’re in Starbucks.

What do you call a whirlpool in a church? Holy water!

ATTENTION : All position for stupid people in my life ,have been filled ,no more applicants need apply. Thank You !