The Shining is my favorite movie about what can happen when you spend too much time with family.

How many nymphomaniacs does it take to screw in a light-bulb? As many as will fit.

A Poem Roses are grey. Violets are grey. Lol, I’m a dog.

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Actually, never mind. I’ll finish, you’ll be thoroughly disappointed, and then I’ll start crying.

How long can an Owl live? 6 1/2 books…

How do you recognize a rich ethiopian? He only wears Rolex around his waist.

Woman hit by train Whats a train doing in a kitchen? (Sexist but creative, not meant to offend anyone.)

So excited to go and watch ‘the Evil Dead’ next week. Anyone else going to Thatcher’s funeral? Bring ’em on! Post em all here.

Why was no at the Premature Ejaculaters’ support group when I arrived? I came early.

The worlds best chat-up line: “I like my women how I like my coffee… Either cheap and bitter or ground up and in the freezer.”