What did one ball say to the other? “This guy in the middle is a dick”

What has 4 legs in the morning, two at lunch, and three in the evening? A cannibal

The life of a Dick. A dick has a sad life. His hair is a mess; his family is nuts; his next-door neighbor is an asshole; his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him habitually.

All in favor of imitating Spanish women say “Aye-yi-yi.”

The masochist asks the sadist: please hurt me. The sadist answers: No!

I’m gonna pretend my dad didn’t abandon me but is actually on the missing Malaysia air flight and he’ll be back

What’s a glow worms favourite song ? Wake me up before you glow glow !

My mate just phoned me to tell me he had changed his name by deed poll to spinal column. “Can I call you back?” I asked.

Wu-Tang is my favorite 15 person rap group and reaction to a beverage.

Fingerprints are proof that God doesn’t trust us