What do cannibals call family members they love? Bae-Kin

A guy told a story about a creeper who got too close to him in /r/minecraft. It blew up. I’ll show myself out.

What goes “Hahahahaha…*thud*”? Someone laughing their head off

What do you call it when three french cats get into a boat only meant for two? Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq!

“Use the forceps, Luke!” – Obi Gyn Kenobi

A reasonably attractive girl applied for a modelling job in a glamour magazine She was a candid eight.

What do you call an epileptic in a lettuce patch? Seizure salad

Hey girl, are you an F5 key? Cause that ass is refreshing.

WIFE: you’re so overly dramatic ME: no i’m not [10 hired backup singers burst through the wall shouting “no he’s not”] dammit guys, not now

What do you call an angry terrorist? Amin Amood