Why does Popeye have such huge forearms? Olive Oil is a virgin

Democrats let their kids open all the gifts on Christmas Eve. Republicans make their kids wait until Christmas morning.

That ONE time In class you raise your hand, and some motherfucker screams out the answer.

I like drawing frat boys on passed out dicks.

Paid a visit to ‘www.conjunctivitis.com’ earlier… Believe me, it’s a site for sore eyes.

Where do bears store their military weapons? In bearracks.

Accuracy ##You miss 100% of the shits you don’t take. Made this typo and thought it was hilarious…

What’s the worst thing about challenging an unjust law? Failing to get away.

How much toilet paper do people use on a daily basis? A shit ton.

Filled the tank up with petrol today. Now all the fish are dead.