I heard Bill Cosby made a SexTape. . . It’s twice as strong as Duct Tape.

What do you call a homeless guy who broke up with his girlfriend a while ago? A man who hasn’t eaten in days.

What did the burger do when he ate his enemy the hotdog? he relished it

Why did the man commit suicide by helium suffocation? He wanted to go out on a high note.

I don’t understand why I keep getting denied for bank loans because I have good credit & I’m only asking to borrow like four or five banks.

“WHAT IS IT? WHAT IS GOING ON? IS THAT RAIN? OH GOD I WISH I HAD EYES” – Worms

So i found a new clickbait technique. So did you.

I wonder what the chimpanzee who will one day feast on your eyes and fingers is doing today.

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just beat the room for being black. *drops mic, gets beat by security*

What kinda vegetables like to party? Lettuce turnip da beet!