Women are like hurricanes… They enter your life wet and wild, and they leave with your lawn furniture THAT WE BOUGHT TOGETHER SARAH, YOU BITCH.

And The Bro saith unto them, Follow me to the club, and I will make you fishers of women. Bromans 4:19

bicycle cop: im taking you to jail me [sarcastic voice]: should i ride on your pegs or walk next to you [segway cop just dying laughing]

Is knowing of collapse of supermarket in Latvia? Is sad but now has five more potato for all of Latvia.

Games of thrones has more __ than a __ Incest, Redneck wedding Fill in the blanks with your best joke!

What’s Mary short for? She’s got little legs, I guess.

Why would you never want to go to a gay BBQ? Because the hotdogs taste like shit.

I was gonna go on a double date the other day… But in the end I couldn’t find three other people to go with me.

There are 10 types of people 1. Those who understand binary 2. Those who don’t 3. Those who sneak tertiary into their jokes

What kind of tea did the American colonists want? Liberty