There once was a poet on Twitter who grew increasingly bitter. He couldn’t surmount the strict character count and so his poems got even shi

How does a Jew make a cup of tea? Hebrews it

If I had a dollar for every gender there is… I’d have two dollars.

I’ve got a 100 question vocab quiz this friday on 9/11… Well I guess I’m gonna bomb it

Some people are like pennies. Two-Faced And Worthless.

Him: You smell good…what are you wearing? Me: Weed.

The ending of “Romeo and Juliet” is only sad if you think two fourteen year-olds should have gotten married.

Why is the British weather like Islam? Because it’s either Sunni or Shi’ite

[Pickup] got a dank sub woofer for $100 today whoops wrong sub

What do you call a dog that goes through your stuff? Snoop dog.