This is just a quick shout-out to bread bowls, waffle cones and other edible containers. You guys are doing a great job.

Why don’t we call the Hindenburg… … the Skytanic?

The worst thing about Muhammad Ali sending a “Tweet” to Mayweather . . . Ali couldn’t type it and Mayweather couldn’t read it.

Studies show that men who have sex more often tend to have a longer life expectancy. Unless your wife finds out.

My girlfriend said I talked just like Justin Bieber… …I said, “What do you mean?”

if we’re on a date and you’re rude to the waiter I’d be like holy shit I’m on a date

Confucius said, man who sleep with itchy bum… … wake up with smelly finger. BA DUM TSS~

Go ahead, mate with someone who wears glasses, add to the degradation of our eyesight as a species. Not like there are bears we need to spot

I dont think being Gay is a choice Becuase if it was who would want to be Gay?

A tiny island deep in the Indian Ocean called Shiffer has the dumbest people in the world… It’s why when you do something really stupid they say you have “Shiffer brains” – Johnny Carson.