Where did Noah keep his bees? In his ark hives

Why does the disinterested Italian man have perfect skin? Because he’s aloof-a

What do you call an Asian penguin? A penguyen

You can tell a lot about a person by how early their neighbors call the cops on Thanksgiving.

Q: Why can’t blondes put in light bulbs? A: They keep breaking them with the hammers.

This poster that says “Green Day: Sold Out” is right in two ways

What’s an emo’s favorite game? Russian roulette, except with a full chamber.

Most guys walk up and stick it in… I stick it in then walk up…

My neighbor won’t give me a straightforward answer, he’s always beating around the bush. Every time I ask why he just says “fuck you Gerald, it’s my bush and I’ll masturbate here if I want to”

What do you call an American with a lavatory on his head ? John.