Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.

What do you call a torturer who says a lot of puns. A PUNisher

“Why?” – Socrates and four year-olds

What do you call an angry psychologist? A thera-pissed.

What is the only correct answer to the question ‘Are you ticklish?’ I have explosive diarrhea.

If at first you dont succeed, then skydiving probably isn’t for you!

What was the rock band doing at the kitchen sink? Moshing the dishes

I really want a Popsicle but I’m so not in the mood for Freezer Jenga.

What’s worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Finding half a worm in your Apple.

Crude oil is the worst kind of oil because it says offensive things while it pollutes the water and ruins our planet.