Dating a woman in 5 easy steps: 1. Be attentive 2. Don’t be too attentive 3. Show interest 4. Don’t show too much interest 5. Seek therapy

“How is life in North Korea?” I wrote to my North Korean pen pal “I can’t complain” he wrote back.

how to know if a thin girl is anorexic? she posts her nudes in bbw subreddits.

Shout-out to everyone who is struggling with establishing their identity. You know who you are.

“So why do you wanna work at Petsmart?” *imagines running out of the store with all the dogs in my arms* “I’m a people person.”

It’s confusing for me too, but I don’t need your money so you’re going to have to be a nice guy if this is going to work out.

What did one earthquake say to the other? It’s not my fault.

Why doesn’t Justin Bieber like Sports Authority? Because he likes Dicks.

How did the gay wizard dissappear? He went with a poof!

What do you get if you cross an alligator with Sherlock Holmes ? An Investigator.