What do parliament and Ukrainian skies have in common? They’re both raining bodies

What to you call a fat computer? A dell

most people don’t realize that chickpeas only get $0.79 for every $1 a manpea makes

What’s the best part of being a lesbian in 1912? Both got seats on the titanic’s lifeboats.

Q. How can you tell if someone is half Catholic and half Jewish? A. When he goes to confession he takes a lawyer with him.

‘Failed to send tweet,’ is Twitter’s polite way of saying, ‘Dude..’

Bernie Sanders Draws 28,000 in Portland Rally I never would have guessed he was such a talented and quick artist.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? Just Juan.

I’m still waiting for the episode of Extreme Home Make Over where they demolish a hobo’s cardboard box and build him a crate…

Where does a pornstar go for timeout? The casting couch