How does Hilary Clinton clean her glasses? By wiping the mainframe.

Sex while camping… It’s in tents.

the dead are the best people to not show respect to. suck it, anonymous author of the epic of gilgamesh. I can run& breathe. your just bones

Winnie-the-Pooh is in tears He got Triggered.

Can’t believe I’m not invited to things I’d never go to.

They offered me money to promote a product in my Twitter account, but my dignity is strong, as Axion “The true grease stain remover”

I’m in line behind a lady with 100 coupons so come visit me in jail, OK?

Russian nesting dolls are so pretentious. They’re so full of themselves.

What’s a Chinese chicken’s favorite vegetable? Buock choi

Jewish telegram: “Begin worrying. Details to follow.”