If you’re in a clown posse, you don’t need to tell us you’re insane. We know. Nobody’s thinking you’re an emotionally stable clown posse.

Love, ethnic food, & the end of the world. What do you kiss on a Mexican dish that will trigger the end of the world? El Taco Lips.

Long ago, my mentor told me to look into self improvement. He used to mumble a bit, though. Now I don’t have the discipline to actually build one, but I know everything about constructing shelves.

What did the tin man say after he was ran over by a steamroller? “Curses! Foil again!”

Read about a 60 yr old woman wanting to swim from Florida to Cuba & felt inspired & wanted to help so I emailed her a picture of a boat

Marathons should keep going until only one person hasn’t shit themselves and that person should be the winner.

A seal walks into a club And soon after an Inuit family has a nice meal.

Why do women prefer 77 more than 69? Because they get 8 (ate) more. Repurposed from a /u/sciomancy6 comment.

I got fired from my job at the Orange Juice factory They said I couldn’t concentrate

What do you call a run-down and Italian neighborhood? The Sphaghetto