New Series For The The History Channel The History Channel is planning a new series, “Airline Tragedies.” They are putting the pilot together as I write this.

What do you call a teacher that doesn’t fart in public? A private tutor (tooter) Heard it from a guy on the street selling newspapers in front of the art institute in chicago.

Q: What do space aliens put on their windows? A: Venutian blinds.

My wife said she was feeling Light-Headed from a Low Iron Level… So to help her, I raised the Ironing Board to a more Suitable Height…

What do you get when you cross a penis and a potato? A dicktator!

What’s fourteen inches and white? Nothing.

Why can it be so annoying to drive a Skoda? The Czech engine light is always on.

My girlfriend was on her. So I put it in her:

In my next life, I’d like to come back as someone who has a life.

GOD: I call them Water Buffalo ANGEL: But they live on land GOD: Yep ANGEL: GOD: ANGEL: u really dont care anymore do u GOD: Not a bit