What’s the worst thing about being a black Jew? You have to stand at the back of the gas chamber

“Cool, I love candles. What’s with the knives? Wait, stop. Please stop!” – pumpkin

If maxi pad commercials didn’t exist, us women would have no idea that we’re full of blue windshield wiper fluid.

What’s the difference between a peeping tom and a rapist? A rapist doesn’t waste time beating around the bush

What’s the difference between incest porn and regular porn? The mute button.

“You are what you eat” [Eats a confident person] Now we wait…

What did the seamen say to his friend? It was a long road, but I ended up coming out a head.

What do Lewinsky, Monroe, and Reddit have in common? They all went down on a President.

Someone with a thick Italian accent walks up to a man and says “I really like europeanness.”

Parents, talk to your kids about grammar. Forget drugs and sex, they’ll learn that shit on the streets.