What’s the Difference Between a Hormone and a Pheromone? You can’t hear a pheromone.

I’m planning on ringing the new year in with a kiss … whether my dog likes it or not.

Who’s the first Irishman to come outside every Spring? Patty O’Furniture

I don’t understand why fat people get so much hate? They have love handle’s not hate handle’s

Two sowing machines are sitting in a bar.. And one says, *”Are you a singer?”* Then the other replies, *”Why? Janome?”*

What do you call a three humped camel? Pregnant. (Credit goes to the trailer of Zootopia)

Guys, if you buy ANY woman clothing, & you don’t get her a size S with a gift receipt, you’re an asshole.

What does a neckbeard eat for breakfast? Pankeks.

I could tell you a joke about TCP…. But I’d have to keep repeating it until you got it.

While watching Hangover 2 the other day, I say to my friend, “I wonder where they’re going in the third one?” “Straight to DVD.”