This Dollar Store thesaurus sure is coming in… *shuffle shuffle* …hippopotamus.

“My wife’s having a relationship with the Speaker of the House of Representatives” “Boehner?” “No, she assures me it’s completely platonic.”

Hey 300lb lady, stop bragging about your cup size. It doesn’t count when your entire body is double D.

A German woman is walking down the street. Eleven blonde guys walk up and attack her. She screams ”Nein! Nein!” So two guys walk away.

Want to hear a short joke? A midget walks under a bar.

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? You can’t tell it’s in the dark

Knock knock “Hey Walter, wanna hear a joke?” “Sure” “Knock kno- ” “I AM THE ONE WHO KNOCKS!!!”

What do you call fat dubstep? Chubby wubby

How hard do you need to press someone’s boob to ooze out milk ? About tree fiddy.

I saw a guy walking 4 dogs this morning and thought, Wow!.. That guy must be really blind.