If X-Men and Legend of Korra had a crossover what kind of bender would Magneto be? A Fassbender

Interesting piece of history… In 1872, the Arabs invented the condom, using a goat’s lower intestine. In 1873, the British somewhat refined the idea by taking the intestine out of the goat first.

What’s the difference between an astronaut and a NASA intern? One’s constantly preparing for lunch.

[at a party] *taps wife’s shoulder* I’ve looked everywhere…where are all the swings? (wife pulls away from kissing Bob) “What?”

Little Johnny When I was a boy, I prayed, and prayed, for a bike but never got one. Then I realized that God don’t work that way. So I stole a bike, then asked for forgiveness.

I’m not saying I’m a bad cook. But how long does pasta stay in the toaster?

Hilter was weird You would think a pig would like people who don’t eat pork.

The problem with protests… Is that once things start to get lit, the cops show up and ruin it.

Why does the spanish dude keep walking left? Because izquierda going right.

I log in and out of Facebook at the same speed a frightened kid runs down into the basement to grab something and runs back up.