Quidditch. Scratching yourself with a pound coin.

TIL The U.S is #18 in Mathematics worldwide. At least we’re in the top 10.

What idiot called it a tree trimmer instead of a branch manager?

What’s green and hurts when it hits you in the eye? A snooker table

yo here’s a cool name: “Wolf Blitzer.” Damn that’s cool as hell. Let’s give it to the lamest nerd imaginable.

Why did the man take a pencil to bed ? To draw the curtains !

Q: Do you know why the new football stadium they built in Warsaw could not be used? A: No matter where you sat you were behind a Pole.

What’s a mole’s favourite fruit? An Avagadro.

if a woman tells me she just wants be friends I say ok but I get to be rachel

You guys wanna hear a joke? Ellen Pao