I got my first real 6-string Bought it at the 5 & dime Played it til my fingers bled Mom sued the guitar manufacturer & settled out of court

You’ve been found guilty of murder in the 1st degree. Your sentence is 20 years of being trapped in a FB group message about a baby shower.

Life is like a box of chocolates… It can be a load of shit.

Hey baby, you’re just like my little toe… …because I’m going to bang you on every piece of furniture in my home.

What is black & white, black & white, black & white, black & white, black & white, black & blue? A nun falling down the stairs

give us a pickup line related to your profession WITHOUT revealing your profession. we’ll try to guess I might have posted in the wrong sub Reddit. let me know if we should move it!

Where do bee’s go to the bathroom? At the BP station.

Adding “family” to words sucks out all the fun: Vacation? Family vacation. Car? Family car. Movie? Family movie. Affair? Family affair.

Why didn’t Trump drown? Because shit floats.

Top 3 invisible things: 1) 2) 3)