Studies show that Alabama, Mississippi and Tennessee have an obesity rate of over 30%. Maybe they’ll change their name from the Bible Belt to the Loosened Belt.

The world would be a much better place if people like Adolf Hitler were still born. EDIT: typo, ‘stillborn’

Police chase I was racing towards a cliff with police sirens ringing in my ears when I noticed my mirror was broken and I realized there was no looking back now

What’s white and crawls up your leg? Uncle Ben’s Perverted Rice

Accordion to a recent study, switching the words of a sentence with a musical instrument often goes unnoticed. It’s science.

How did the Vagina want her eggs cooked? Ovaries-y

I have a MASSIVE heroine problem… I’m addicted to fat women who save my life.

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door who do you let in first? – The dog. He’ll shut up once you let him in.

I’m filming a documentary on the serious subject of circumcision. It’s called Robbin’ Hood.

What do you call the Moon spirit that at once sits upon a lake of glowing jade and exists nestled within our divine souls? Altha’or syzygena