Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella? Fo’ drizzle

Why was Pavlov’s hair so soft? Classical Conditioning (told by my psychologist student friend that is not on reddit, so all credit to him)

Skinny= Anorexic Thick= Obese. Virgin= Too good. Non-Virgin= Slut. Friendly= Fake. Quiet= Rude. It seems like you can never please society

How do you tell if your scrotum is ticklish? Give it a couple test tickles

What’s a nice guys favorite type of wood? M’hogany

I can’t imagine why more guys don’t do yoga. 1. Yoga pants 2. Lots of girls 3. Lots of girls in yoga pants doing yoga moves

Why is Santa’s sack so big??? Well, he only cums once a year…

Operator: 999, emergency services. Which service do you require? Me: Oh! Don’t mind me, I was just cleaning cake off the touch screen.

There are two things I don’t like in my girlfriend. It’s her chin.

You know what’s really odd? Numbers not divisible by 2.