How many Super Saiyans does it take to change a light-bulb? (It’s not >9000) FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGGGGON BAAAAL ZEEEEEEEEE

Hey, Edgar Allen, go ahead and Poe me up another drink! Don’t tell me to be quiet, lady! Why are there so many books in this bar?

A woman gets a C section What does the doctor say to the woman who has to get a c section? There’s not enough womb!

ME: I cant make it in today BOSS: again? why M: my car died B: that’s the same excuse you used yesterday M: yeah but today’s the funeral

why cant Paul Walker use tumblr? He only sticks to the dashboard

My truck is a lot like Tony Romo. It will turn over, but the clutch doesn’t work.

How do you guys feel about that new drug-resistant superbug? It makes me sick.

Did you hear about that cheese factory that exploded in France?? There was nothing left but de Brie.

Eli5: how preventing users from submitting anything to subs helps anything.

A man walks into a bar and see three bitches. Because he’s a misogynist.