Saw Robin Hood. Basically it’s a film about stealing 13 dollars from evil movie-goers and giving it to the studios.

I was an army sniper, until I was discharged. It must have been my accuracy. It was very hit and miss.

When two idiots have the same dumb idea… special minds think alike

I’ve always thought chicken breasts just come from female chickens, but it turns out they come from males as well. I suppose that means that I’ve literally eaten a ton of cock in my life.

What did the deer say to its lover? You are very “deer” to me.

Beauty is only skin deep but that’s ok because my eyes can’t see any farther than that.

A bodybuilder gets lost in the woods… And dies of starvation when he can’t find his whey.

Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.

One potato asks another: -“Are you sure we are related?” -“Yes I yam!”

An oldie but a goodie: What do Pink Floyd & Dale Earnhardt Sr. have in common? Their last biggest hit was The Wall