What i if told you You that read wrong And that probably too

Sometimes I masturbate while driving The passengers on my bus don’t like it, but the high school hasn’t fired me yet…

Free Willy…..Again?!?!?! Why da phuq! Did they have to “free Willy” so many f***ing times?!?!

What is the thing called that irrigates your lawn? A garden Jose.

Before emjois i had to end texts to my girlfriends with “two girls holding hands* heart* kissy face* glass of wine* nail polish* red lips.”

I can’t stand the kids of this generation. It’s always meme, meme, meme.

Why can’t Helen Keller drive a car? Because she’s dead.

Q: How do cats buy things? – A: From a cat-alogue!

Roadside motels are a good place to stay if you haven’t decided yet whether you want to kill someone or be killed.

What do you get hanging from orange trees? Sore arms.