Life is all about perspective… The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the ship’s kitchen.

Whats does dissecting a frog and explaining a joke have in common? Sure, you know how it works, but now it’s dead.

I like my coffee, how I like my slaves. free

What does a ninja and a muslim woman have in common? They’re both invisible.

Why did the bat miss the bus? Because he hung around for too long.

Sometimes I squat… …and pull my legs up to my chest and lean forward. Why? That’s how I roll.

Two electrons are having a conversation… Electron 1: Do you know why they call it the XBOX 360? Electron 2: Why? Electron 1: Because when you see it, you spin 360 degrees and walk away!

What do you call a fat person with a flat butt? A hipobottomless

Forever 21… pounds overweight

A bunch of toilets were stolen from the police department… They have nothing to go on.