If there’s someone in the aisle of something I need at the grocery store I don’t need it anymore.

Why are there so many Johnson in he phone book? They all have phones.

What’s a gay man’s favorite time? Eight a’cock

“Brokeback Mountain” is not just a movie. It’s also what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.

Apparently 95% of the girl like to be waking up by oral sex !!! Well its not true, “WHO ARE YOU AND REMOVE THIS FROM MY MOUTH” Said the girl in the park yesterday !!

Bikes are held up by witchcraft if u can ride a bike you are a level 1 wizard & if u can ride a unicycle you are a level 2 dork haha owned

Of course size matters. No one likes a small pizza.

If you ever see a movie where a woman is depressed and she has shaved legs that movie is bullshit.

If you ever see a creepy clown… Go for the juggler

Who is this Rorschach guy? And why does he paint so many pictures of my parents fighting?