Why are all the girls in my school dressed up like OP,s mom?

In 2017 I’m going to start eating healthy again. This marks the end of my cheat decade.

I ate a salad today and it contained both eggs and chicken I didn’t know where to start.

[donald trump wakes up from getting his wisdom teeth removed. his mouth stuffed with gauze] did i builded the big walls yet?

What is the best contraceptive for old people? Nudity

What dog is the worst at polishing a turd? A poodull

Doctor Doctor I keep seeing double. Please sit on the couch. Which one!

What would Martin Luther King be if he was white? Alive. He would be alive.

Panic rooms are a great way to protect yourself during home invasions or like if you forget your wife’s birthday.

Coffee is so addicted to me, it can’t wait to get in my belly. In its defense, my belly is awesome.