A football team should setup a charity that gives presents to children with Down Syndrome …and call it Touch Downs.

How Did Harry Potter Get Down The Hill? Walking. Jk Rowling.

What’s the difference between a bear and the Bears football team? Nothing, they both shit in the woods.

How people think Brain: “You’re weird.” Body: “and you’re fat.” Face: “plus you’re pretty ugly” Food: “I’m here for you babe…”

My hands are really reliable I can always count on them.

Why does the indian rain dance always work? Becuase they keep dancing until it works.

I found an alternative to Pokemon GO. It’s this new game called Grindr. I haven’t tried it yet, but I hear its this thing where you go around, trying to capture bears.

What do you call a bolt that dresses like a woman? A cross-threader

What’s fat, sweaty, and bad at cooking? My ex wife!

I got together with a pig and… I think she’s my Sowmate. ( ^ @ ^ )