I always felt sorry for homeless gay people They have no closet to come out of.

I bought some shoes from my dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I’ve been tripping all day.

What’s the difference between 9/11 and a cow? You can only milk a cow for 10 years.

Wife told me she wants to have sex in the back of the car… She asked me if I could drive 🙁 Credit to Legend Rodney Dangerfield

I feel like a white girl prime number because I ALMOST literally can’t even…

What’s black and brown on the inside and blue and white on the outside? Jail

Why are black people so tall? Because their knee-grows

If I believed changing my profile picture could change the world I’d change it to a picture of vending machines that dispense tiger cubs

I had a Muslim kid in my high school and he was notorious for being late So we called him 9/12

What’s the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? On a porcupine, the pricks are on the outside.