How do cops get rid of flies? They call in a S.W.A.T. team

Why are men so smart while having sex? Because they are plugged into a fucking know-it-all.

Women wake up yawning and men with an erection. Coincidence? I think not.

how to you circumcise a red neck uppercut his sister

Jokes about stuttering are a big big no no

I popped into Tesco last night to get some oxo cubes but couldn’t see any on the shelf, they must be out of stock!

How much did the pirate charge for corn? He sold them for a buccaneer.

What did the surgeon say when the doctor declined going out after work? Suture self!

TV that gets louder to compensate for when you are chewing.

“Gunman” is too cool-sounding. Can we start calling them something that conveys weakness, like “pistoleer?”