What do German women’s lingerie and Africa have in common? Ze-bras!

An old Vermonter is sitting on his porch. A New Yorker is passing by and stops to chat. He asks the old timer, “Have you lived here all your life.” “Not yet.”

Did you year about the chinese male prostitute? He’ll give you a Bro-Job.

I bet nobody noticed Superman flying around at first, so Clark just started pointing out every bird and plane until it caught on

Trolling my FB friends by commenting “Looking good ;)” on solo pics of their husbands

What does a baby smell like in a microwave? Nsfw I don’t know I was too busy jerking off.

Why is the pussy slit verticaly and not horizontaly? So it doesn’t clap when running.

Her: All the men have jackets on. Why didnt you wear the sports jacket I got you? Me: You bought me a ski jacket Her: Skiing is a sport!

In these tough times, you can pop in the Titanic DVD to watch rich people die painfully, their money powerless against the fury of nature

1st Roman Soldier: What is the time ? 2nd Roman Soldier: XX past VII !