What did the egg say at the party? Omelet

My friend bored me when talking about Latin… they had discussed it ad nauseam.

Why is life like a penis? Because Women make it hard!

I’m like Global Warming… No one takes me seriously.

Why did hitlers aircraft preform so badly after the invasion of russia? because they were stalin’

My hands got into an argument last night One was right and the other left

I bought the worst thesaurus the other day. Not only is it terrible, it’s terrible.

What’s black and white and black and white and black and white and green? A skunk rolling down a hill with a pickle in its mouth.

“You’re bleeding because you don’t floss” Me: No, I’m bleeding because I ate the entire bowl of deceivingly fake fruit in your waiting room.

What type of music do they listen to in the Czech Republic? Prague Rock.