So I’m about to have a unilateral orchiectomy (true story)… and I say to the urologist surgeon, “I guess the ball’s in your court now”

What did the farmer say when someone pooped into his water source? Well shit…

Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for indecent jurisprudence? He got off on a technicality.

I was going to tell a joke about amnesia But for the life of me, I can’t seem to remember it!

I have a joke about minidisc… …but it’s a little CD.

I don’t know why people are afraid of flying Most crashes happen at ground level

Did you hear about Joseph Stalin’s personal yacht? They say it was a huge dictator-ship.

Being in love is like peeing your pants: everybody sees it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

Me: I’m ghosting him. Her: You stopped talking to him? Me: No, I’m showing up when he least expects it and scaring the shit out of him.

A friend of mine has been rushed to hospital, after eating a horse-burger. Apparently he is now in a stable condition.