Threesome So, I finally talked my wife into having a threesome… So she said the only condition is that she pick the other girl… So I told her no… I will pick both of them..

Swimming Is Good For You… Especially if you are drowning.

How is the American public now like Socrates? By November, they will have both picked their poison.

When man made the first stone tool 2.6 million years ago, I don’t think they could have ever imagined a tool as great as Donald Trump.

I saw a guy holding a TV I was walking down the street, when I saw a black guy holding a TV. I thought “holy shit, is that mine?” I went home to check. But nah, mine was at home polishing my shoes.

My Welsh mate was found dead yesterday. He died the way he would have wanted to go… He passed away peacefully in his sheep

A baby seal walks into a club

[running amok in flames] WHY ARE INFLAMMABLE THINGS FLAMMABLE!?

How much do pirates pay to get an earring? A Buccaneer.

If steroids are illegal for athletes, then Photoshop should be illegal for models