Yeah, did you hear about the really chatty snake gynecologist? Well, he was good at his job, but I just couldn’t stand how he kept sticking his head in my business.

What do you call an annoying black person? A nagger.

My kids are very optimistic. Every glass they leave sitting around the house is at least half full.

If you come mow my lawn for me I promise to look out the window occasionally and give you a thumbs up.

You don’t have to like me but at least base it on your own opinion, not someone Else’s.

What kind of overalls does Mario wear? denim denim denim

What is a Mexican’s favorite Olympic event? Cross country

Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Welcome to the jungle. Happy Birthday to you. – Christina Aguilera at a kid’s birthday party.

I hate East German Cars I mean, the Trabant was a load of old pants.

Justin Bieber made a racist joke when he was 15. Quick, someone give him $2 billion for his basketball team to teach him a lesson.