I just participated in a silent disco. Well, I got drunk at the morgue.

I have Alzheimer’s AMA (Not sure if repost) Yes, this is a x-post from /r/circlejerk, but still a pretty good joke in my opinion.

What’s 3 inches long and pleases all women? A credit card.

cremation vs burial During a tunisian funeral , a buddhist tourist asked a man . -why don’t you burn the body ? – we just buried the body because God will burn him down

I don’t think the church is going to let me pick music for the bible group again. In my defense, the band name “Lamb of God” is misleading.

-Balderdash! -Codswallop! -Tommyrot! -Poppycock! Victorian Era YouTube comments

I accidentally dropped a piece of my bagel in the trash and it feels like a relative died.

What do you get when you cross a border collie with a pit bull? A dog that is smart enough to bury the bodies.

Q: How can you tell Bill Clinton apart from a cow? A: By the wise look in the eyes.

What do you call it when homosexual congressmen have lunch together? A Federal Mandate