Yoda: “Mmhhh, why 5 afraid of 6 is?” Because 6 7 8

What would Michael Jackson be doing if he were alive right now? Probably clawing at the inside of his coffin.

If you pee on a cop Urine trouble. (Credit to my bff)

What’s an octopuses favourite latin saying? Squid pro quo!

What do you call an angry German? A sour kraut

There was a surprising surge in Republican support for Syrian Refugees today They found out 80% of the islamic refugees supported punishing gay people and bans on pre-marital sex. *pew-polls*

Did you hear about that Mexican train thief? They say he had loco motives.

Did you hear the one about the guy who couldn’t think of a punch line?

Steve Harvey

(Tell this to your professional friends or relatives) Your must be a fish… because you’ve got lots of SCALES!! YEEEEEEYAAAAAA Edit: (skills/scales?) get it?