A man and a woman walk into an elevator The man asks the woman, can I smell your feet? The woman looks at him with disgust and says no. The man says, it must be your vagina then.

Snowman in the summer What do you call a snowman in the summer? “A puddle”

A fart is just a turd honking for the right of way. Yep

How do you make a tissue dance ? Put a little boogie in it !

Why do Asians prefer Sony? Because it’s a stereo type

It’s taken me ages… …but I’ve finally finished reading Stephen Hawking’s book. It’s about time.

Girls use lotion for hands Boys use lotion for skin.

Eating cheese right off the block then realizing you’ve eaten too much so you eat a bunch of chips makes it like nachos, right? Hey, fellas

You know its Monday when your left eye wont open and your right eye is twitching.

[At a bar] Guy: Did it hurt? Me: What? G: When you fell walking in. I saw you fall on your face. Everyone saw.