What’s a pedophile’s favorite type of shoe? White vans.

What’s the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? The porcupine has pricks on the outside.

Did you hear how the crazy camping show was last weekend? It was in tents.

What’s the difference between 9/11 and a cow? You can’t milk a cow for 15 years

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was too much pride on his side.

What do you call an alligator in a vest? Investigator!

Did you hear the joke about the bees? Its a bit long to tell you now but I asure you it was very honey!

*Throws up some gang signs* *stabs self in eye with salad fork* Hubs: Next time you do the Macarena, put your fork down.

I can’t stop drinking about you.

How do you call a prison inmate? With a cell phone.