What do a Professional Fifa Player and a Rapist have in common? They’re both going to score, even if you don’t want them to.

Because the unspeakable can also happen to men I bought myself a rape alarm. I’ll be fucked if this thing doesn’t work.

My girlfriend says I’m hopeless at fixing appliances. Well she’s in for a shock.

There’s now a morning after pill for guys. It changes your blood type.

Yo mama is so fat that… …she should really be concerned because diabetes is a serious problem

In the time it took you to read this, Woody Allen made another film and it starred some big names and it was ok and now it’s on DVD already

Ana from Frozen was upset it didn’t snow on her Wedding day, but everything has a silver lining because she got 8 inches that night

I’m not lazy… I’m just on my energy saving mode.

What do you do with an epileptic in a bathtub? Laundry.

Why should you never play Uno with a Mexican? Because they’ll steal all the green cards.